Connecting with other parents who share similar experiences can be invaluable when raising an autistic child. Online communities provide a platform to seek support, share insights, and build relationships.
But it's important to ensure you join a reputable and supportive autism parents group…the internet can be a dark and scary place! And the online world of autism blogs, “support” groups, and social media can be a little tricky to navigate
In this article, we’ll provide you with a checklist of key factors to consider when evaluating an online autism parents group, helping you find a safe, nurturing, and helpful community.
Let’s go!
How to Spot a Good Autism Parents Group
The following seven suggestions offer a great starting point to evaluate if any group, whether it’s online or in-person, will meet your needs in a safe and welcoming manner.
Purpose and Guidelines
Look for groups with a clear purpose and guidelines focused on support, understanding, and respect for diverse perspectives. Ensure that the group's objectives align with your needs and values as an autism parent.
Active Moderation
A good autism parents group should have active and vigilant moderation to maintain a safe and supportive environment. Moderators should enforce group guidelines, address conflicts promptly, and prevent the spread of misinformation.
Positive Tone and Supportive Atmosphere
Pay attention to the overall tone of discussions within the group. A good group will foster a positive, empathetic, and non-judgmental atmosphere, and will not allow “dogpiling” or non-productive conversations. Members should provide support, share resources, and offer encouragement to one another.
Reliable Information
Evaluate the quality of information shared within the group. A good autism parents group should promote evidence-based information and reliable resources. Be cautious of groups that endorse unproven treatments or make unrealistic promises. If they start mentioning bleach enemas or “curing” your child with essential oils (that the admin just so happens to sell…), it’s probably time to run!
Diverse Perspectives
Look for groups that embrace diversity and welcome a range of experiences and perspectives. An inclusive group encourages open dialogue, respects differences, and avoids judgment or exclusion based on personal beliefs or experiences.
One special mention is that there are a growing number of amazing autistic adult creators putting out content and helping parents, both neurotypical and neurodiverse, understand and parent their children better. They are an excellent resource to get information and first-hand knowledge of what it’s like to grow up autistic.
Privacy and Confidentiality
Ensure that the group prioritizes privacy and confidentiality. Members should feel comfortable sharing personal stories without the fear of their information being shared outside the group. That being said, the internet is still the internet! Think twice before you share confidential or sensitive information, including pictures of your child (and especially meltdown videos).
Constructive Discussions and Mutual Respect
Assess the quality of discussions happening within the group. A good autism parents group encourages constructive conversations, active listening, and mutual respect. Avoid groups that promote negativity and conflicts, or engage in harmful language or behavior. Autism isn’t the enemy here!
This brings us to…
A Special Note…
I often see parents who are newer to the autism world get overwhelmed or attacked for using the wrong phrase or making an honest mistake because they just don’t know yet.
They get upset, other people’s feelings get hurt, and things devolve from there…not good for anyone involved.
Much like I try to run my coaching practice with humor and empathy, you should look for a group that offers the same things to you!
Be willing to learn, grow, and understand that your viewpoint may not align with someone else’s. Arguing on the internet with strangers never changed anyone’s mind…if it gets to that point, it’s time to walk away.
Also, be mindful that there are some very hurt people walking around this world. And a lot of them have internet access. You will encounter many autistic adults (whether they are diagnosed or not) who may trigger the same anger and frustration responses for you that your child does.
If you find yourself getting angry, the best thing to do is walk away, settle yourself into a state of calm, and try to reflect on why you had the strong emotional reaction you did.
Chances are good there is a lesson for you to learn or an opportunity for growth and connection once the anger subsides.
Conclusion
Finding a supportive online community of autism parents can provide immense comfort, guidance, and a sense of belonging. By considering the factors outlined in this checklist, you can identify a good autism parents group that meets your needs and promotes a positive and helpful environment.
Remember, you deserve a community that supports and uplifts you on your autism parenting journey. If you’re looking for one to join, feel free to follow and engage with me on Instagram or Facebook…I’d love to have your voice as part of our conversation!
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